People don’t come into your life by accident. Everyone that crosses your path serves a purpose. 

















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(M) and I met when we were in 7th grade.   It was right after they returned from Christmas break and I was the new girl.  I moved from a prep school in Huntsville, AL to a school in Bryan, TX where  kids like me were the minority.  Plus the school I moved from was 6th through 8th in one school. The new school was one entire school for just 7th graders and there were more students than all 3 grades at the school I came from.  Plus, coming from a prep school background I didn't even own a pair of pants.  I was still wearing patent leather mary jane shoes and dresses that matched the bows i wore in my hair.  So, the bullies had a field day with me to the say the least.  I was even too terrified to use my locker because it was located right next to the lockers of a group of mean  girls who picked on me the most.  So, I carried all of my text books from class to class. On about my 3rd or 4th day I am calling my parents from a payphone crying and begging them to come get me.  Of course they said no and to toughen up.  I hung up the phone and wiped my tears and turned around and see the cutest boy with the most piercing crystal hazel eyes.   He smiles at me, introduces himself and then offered to carry my books. For the rest of year he carried my books for me from class to class just about every day and we didn't have any classes together!  When any of the other kids would try to pick on me he would stick up for me.  He was also small for boy too.  I think back then I was even taller than him.  So, he caught a lot of flack himself sticking up for me. 



I moved away almost exactly a year later.  However, for some reason I never stopped thinking about him.  Mind you, I went to a total of a 11 different schools before I graduated.  But, he was for some reason the ONLY person that stayed with me in my thoughts.  When I moved back to the same town in Texas in 93' I started looking for him.  But, back then the only way to try and find anyone was 411.  However, he happens to have the 4th most popular first names AND number one most popular last names.   Therefore, I had no luck for the longest time.  But, for some reason...its like a little voice in my head kept telling me to keep looking.  Anytime a new local phone book would come out I would flip through it. Bryan, TX wasn't that big and from time to time there was only a few (M's) but, I would still call them when I would come across I new one.  Then in 2006 I subscribed to a criminal background search site in order to help another friend of mine trying to conduct some research on someone.  I decided to try and give searching for (M) another shot.



The other odd thing...for some reason his birthday was a detail that I also never forgot.  What’s odd is that I don't even know why I knew his birthday.  We never celebrated it together when we were kids and it’s in the summer.  The one summer that I was there when we were kids he spent (along with all his summers) at his grandparents.  When kids are that young, as young as we were.. really the only reason you know any of your friend’s birthday is if you went to their birthday party or something.  But, for some reason... I knew his.  By nature I am HORRIBLE when it comes to remembering birthdays!!  I can't even remember when my own mother's birthday is!! I know its somewhere at the end of April.   However, without knowing his I probably would have NEVER found him. There happens to be over 30,000 people in the US that have the same name. He happens to have one of the most popular first names coupled with one of the most common last names.   So, I typed in his name and birthday and got a hit!!  I was so excited at first my heart jumped!!  I clicked on the link...scrolled down the page and see the words, "MURDER"  & "LIFE SENTENCE." That will be a moment I will NEVER forget!!  All the breath went out of me and I sat there frozen, staring at the screen, not even able to blink..for God knows how long.

 

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Most people probably would have just ended things there and just walked away.  But, for some reason...its like the same little voice that kept telling me to keep looking for him.. told me"don't stop here, write him."  However, the same voice pushed me to find out what happened, find out anything I could before I did.   So, I went to work and started researching, digging up whatever I could find on the internet.  I probably spent nearly 6 months at it. However, the more and more I pieced together the more and more my gut told me he wasn't guilty or at least wasn't the monster the papers made him out to be.  I began to consider the possibility that my best friend from years ago, the sweetest boy I had ever met, who I never stopped thinking about nor caring about had possibly spent the last nearly 15 years (at that time) in prison for something he didn't do. I would share all the details I had gathered, laying them out in front of any of my friends and sometimes strangers when the opportunity would arise.  I even contacted my former boss who was a criminal defense attorney. Whenever I would share the details of his case I was always careful to not share what my own conclusion was until after they told me theirs. I kid you not, I have done this with easily over a 50 people over the years and every single one came to the same conclusion, “something just doesn't seem right, possibly he isn't guilty?” I even sent my notes to a friend of mine who was in law school at the time and he used it as test case for a mock jury trial. Again, not guilty. I guess secretly I had possibly wanted just one person to tell me different and who maybe would have shown me a perspective I had overlooked because being able to convince myself he was guilty would have made the hurt I felt for him, hurt a lot less.

I remember the day when I finally decided to come to terms with the possibility that …just what if, “what if” I was not wrong?  What if…he actually wasn't guilty and had spent the last nearly 15 years (at that time) in prison for something he did not do??  I sat on the floor and cried!  I cried for that sweet little boy I once knew and had never forgotten, that sweet boy who carried my books and protected me from the bullies… I cried because certainly that boy no longer existed even if he wasn't guilty. Because, certainly spending 14 years in prison, especially if you weren't guilty, would cause anyone to change and most likely…not for the best.  But, what was I suppose to do from here? My father always taught me that everything happens for a reason and there is a purpose, God’s purpose for you behind everything that happens in life. There is a reason that over all these years I never forgot him and there was a reason that I finally did find him. I just wasn't sure what or how I was to do whatever it was that God was intending me to do?  What was the “reason” behind everything? But, I just decided to have faith that he would show me along the way.



Even after I had come to realize that there was a good possibility that he wasn't actually guilty of what he has been convicted for I still struggled deeply on what was the next step, if I should actually reach out and write him still? The idea that he possibly had spent the last 15 years (at that time) in prison for something he may not have done actually made me even more scared to write, If that makes any sense to you? I tried to imagine how I would feel and what kind of person I possibly might have become if it were me? I imagine being angry, bitter and resentful at life and the world. I imagined myself hopeless and succumbed to the caliber of prison life. The person that I imagined I would be was not anyone that I would want to bring into my life. Even though the monster the papers made him out to be was so far from the person I knew that it might as well have been someone completely different by the same name and I would have believed that if not for the fact the birth date matching. Even though I had a hard time believing the picture the papers painted but, what if the last 15 years had caused him to become that person in the papers?



But, for some reason....it's like the same little voice that would whisper his name and birthday in my head just often enough over the years to not forget it... that same voice kept telling me to write anyway. But, before I did, I even emailed the prison. Just to see if they could tell me at least what kind of inmate was he... I mean... is he someone who is kept in chains and solitaire... would they tell me that he had become that monster? They wrote back and although they could not tell me much they did tell me that he had the second highest level status of a trustee, which is exactly what I could imagine “that sweet little boy” becoming.



So, I sat down, took a deep breath and ended up staring at the computer screen for several hours. I had no idea how to even begin or what to say. Basically I just wanted to tell him that I learned what had happened to him and I wanted to let him know that there was at least one person out in the world that hadn't forgot him. I wasn't even sure if he would write back but, my heart would not allow me to not write anyway.



Less than a week later I opened my mailbox and I see his first letter. I remember shaking as I walked back to my apartment, nervous over what or who I was about to learn he had become. Would I be opening a Pandora’s Box once I opened that letter?
I took another deep breath, made a silent prayer and opened it. By the time I was done with the first paragraph any concerns or nervousness I felt quickly went away and I had no doubt that I had done the right thing.



If you were to read his letters you would have no idea that he has been through what he has and where he has spent the last 20 years of his life, guilty or not. They have been nothing but, Inspirational and positive. He is educated, cultured... and has spent his time just continuing to become the best man he can. He has worked his way up with jobs, earning recognition from his superiors and other staff members for his skills and dedication for his work... He has taken whatever kind of classes they have available, He is involved in the prison ministries, taken whatever kind of trade classes he could in order to learn whatever new skills he can.

One of the  the most remarkable about him is that he actually holds no bitterness and has even said to me that he wouldn't change the last 20 years for anything because he was able to become who is today and has learned skills, obtained an education and most importantly learned an appreciation for life, all things he is grateful for and probably would not have otherwise if things had turned out differently for him because at the time he was arrested, even though he didn't do what he has been convicted of,  he was however, still headed down the wrong path. There is no telling just how much further down that path he would be or if he would even still be alive, if not for having spent the last 20 years where he has been. He actually attributes the system (Texas Dept of Criminal Justice) for saving his life.  That epiphany in itself left me speechless.



I am a firm believer in that “Everything in life happens for a reason! Everyone that you cross paths with in life whether it be for a moment or a lifetime holds a purpose in your life, whether it be a small fraction of a moment or a life changing one.”   I believe that the reason why over all these years that little voice kept whispering his name in my thoughts causing me to never forget him and then later propelled me to look for him and not give up until I did find him was because my purpose in his life is to help him.  I plan to not ever give up until I do.